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Routines to Set Children with ADHD up for Success at Home  

 
 
If you’re a parent of a child with ADHD, you know how difficult simple areas of the day can often be. Getting out of the house for school on time? Chaotic. Having your child sit down after school to finish their homework? A battle. Getting through the bedtime routine? Exhausting. 

You are not alone. One of the key components of ADHD is that symptoms occur in more than one setting - such as both home AND school - so it makes sense that multiple parts of the day become difficult. 

Children with ADHD have both inattentiveness and hyperactivity/impulsiveness that affects their ability to pay attention, remember items or steps in a sequence, stay organized during tasks, sit still, wait their turn, and carry out verbal instructions. This is not their fault - there are both genetic and neurological factors at play. 

One of the best ways to help children with ADHD across the board is to establish and follow consistent and predictable routines at home. Routines can be defined as a series of steps that happen in a particular order, in the same way, and at the same general time from day to day. Routines provide predictability, which helps your child know what to expect, what is expected of them, and how that experience is going to look. All of these things help the day run smoother! 

Though many parents already follow routines at home, there are four key components of routines that work particularly well for children with ADHD. They are: 

1. Movement - Children with ADHD need to move. Their bodies often require a higher threshold for sensory input (particularly proprioceptive and vestibular input, fancy terms for body awareness and body movement), and so movement that is sensory-based helps provide their body with that “just-right” amount that is needed to stay regulated. Rhythmic, linear movements, such as jumping jacks, and “heavy work” activities, such as push-ups, are the best kinds of movement. 

2. A decluttered space - This decreases the likelihood of distraction, as many children with ADHD are distracted by things that they see in their vicinity. Choosing a set place that is tidy to complete specific routines, such as completing homework, can help your child stay on task. 

3. Using timers - Visual timers, such as the Time Timer, allows your child to SEE time. This helps the concept of time become concrete. Timers can be used to transition to a routine (such as 10 minutes until bedtime) or to allot time that a routine will take place (such as 25 minutes to complete homework). 

4. Using checklists - Checklists are another way your child is able to better internalize their steps or responsibilities of a routine. Children with ADHD often have difficulty following directions that have multiple steps or tend to get lost or distracted in between steps, so writing them down and checking them off as they go can be very helpful. If your child can’t read yet, you can use pictures instead of words. Checklists also help YOU, the parent, from having to repeat yourself a million and one times. 
 

Keeping these four components in mind, let’s go over some sample routine ideas for three key parts of your child’s day. 
 

Sample Morning Routine 

• Wake up - Set a timer for the amount of time until you need to be leaving the house. 
• Wash up in the bathroom (Use toilet, brush teeth, wash face, etc) - Post a checklist in the bathroom to help your child remember what they need to do. 
• Get dressed - Choose the outfit the night before and lay out the clothing to keep mornings running smoothly. 
• Eat breakfast 
• Brush teeth 
• Gather belongings - Keep belongings in the same spot nearby the door so your child knows where they are. Post a list with words or pictures of the items your child needs to leave the house (shoes, jacket, backpack, lunch box, etc) 

Sample After-School Routine 

• Enter home 
• Unpack belongings - Have a clear, set place where your child places their shoes, backpack, and jacket. Use hooks, labels, and checklists to help them remember. 
• Eat snack 
• Outdoor play or 15 minutes of indoor movement - Jumping jacks, freeze dance, Go Noodle youtube video, etc 
• Complete homework - Have a predetermined tidy space, set a visual timer for how long they are expected to work 
• Preferred play activity - This helps them have something to work towards when completing homework 

Sample Bedtime Routine 

• Set a timer for how many minutes until bedtime 
• 10 minutes of movement - Consider whether your child does better with high activity movement before bed or something calmer like following along to a yoga video 
• Change into pajamas 
• Brush teeth 
• Read books 
• Lights out 

There you have it! As you can see, simple routines are best. It does not have to be complicated, but keeping these parts of your child’s day consistent and predictable can truly be a game-changer. The Time Timer is a great tool to use within these three routines and more. Click HERE for my affiliate link. 

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Jessica Rapp Irwin, OTR/L, is a pediatric occupational therapist, childhood routine expert, and lover of all things child development. She founded Rooted in Routine, an online parent coaching platform, to help parents learn simple, easy to implement routines for optimal child development starting at age one. She is passionate about educating parents on NORMAL, HEALTHY development, which is often simpler than we think. Jessica’s approach is largely rooted in going back to the basics to help you establish solid, age-appropriate routines for your child for things like eating, play, and sleep. She believes this is the most important foundation you can provide for your child - and she wants to help you do just that! Learn more about Jessica at https://www.rootedinroutine.com/about and follow her on Instagram at @rootedinroutine.

Seven years ago I was sitting in a psychologist’s office and feeling pretty astounded. How could my parents, grandparents, teachers, camp counselors, friends’ parents, employers, etc. have missed this? How did I? How was I thirty years old and just then being diagnosed with ADHD? 

The answer: ADHD manifests differently in women than it does in men and is more likely to be completely looked over or misdiagnosed. In my case, when I was in school, I was an excessive daydreamer rather than a hyperactive student. Since I wasn’t disturbing the class, my teachers were busy writing home to the boy’s parents that were. The notes to my parents often included remarks like, “Not living up to her potential” or “She isn’t completing her homework on a regular basis, how can we get her to care about her schooling?”  

I did care, but I was bogged down with anxiety about being called on, crippling fear of test-taking, and absolutely no clue how time just seemed to pass me by. 

I finished college, it wasn’t the easiest thing for me, and I vowed I was done with school. No more tests for as long as I lived! But as we adults know, just because you may not be getting tested on Calculus, you may need to pass a test to get licensed for a profession, or a certification. The fight or flight that I was feeling as a child hadn’t really disappeared even as an adult. In fact, it was just one of many symptoms that seemed to be affecting my life. My confidence was low because I grew to think I wasn’t intelligent because of my school performance, I seemed to be getting more forgetful as I aged, I had problems with follow-through, and lack of motivation.  

I had been seeing a talk therapist for other aspects of my life, and in one session mentioned that I came across an article by Dr. Amen about women with ADD. I told my therapist that a lot of what I read really resonated with me. After that meeting, she referred me to the psychiatrist that diagnosed me. It was strange getting a diagnosis by someone that didn’t know me at all, and they asked me if there was anything I actually wanted to do with that information since I was already thirty years old and had clearly managed it in some fashion. Of course, I wanted to do something about it! If I knew in my school days the tips and tricks that I know now, I may have loved school. I may have even excelled. 

At that time I opted to pass on the suggested medication and instead I hired an ADHD Coach. Yes, those exist! They taught me skills that allowed me to feel empowered by the creative ways my brain worked through problems and tricks for helping me to stay focused. I’m a strong visual learner. When my coach suggested timing my tasks with a visual timer I searched the internet and asked around and found the Time Timer. It is a tool that has endless uses and helps to keep my wandering mind on track.  

For me, age has nothing to do with bettering my life. I have now, at age 37 advocated for myself and found ways to manage my ADHD. I am now the most productive and confident I’ve ever been. Bonus, now I have the tools to help my son with his ADHD.